Dateline 2025: How Woodley and Usman overcame their differences

In an exclusive interview with MMALaundry, Tyron “The Chosen One” Woodley explains how he squashed the beef between himself and UFC Welterweight Champion Kamaru Usman.

“It was during the rematch that I finally realized why I hated Karamu so much,” Tyron said. “When he was holding me down on the canvas and grinding me and I could feel his mus-kles and smell the sweat, I felt little bubbles of joy in my tummy and I knew I wanted to spend the rest of my life with him — preferably in that exact position. All that pent-up emotion was love that I mistook for hate.”

“I submit, you sexy man!”

“Luckily for me, Karamu could sense my passion and he felt the same way. We almost kissed in round four, but we’re professionals, so we finished the fight to please the fans. Let me tell you, we went another five rounds later that night. Talk about championship rounds. Hey!”

After a series of business and entertainment failures including an album called “I Got the Flow” by Woodley’s rap alter-ego known as “The Menses,” Tyron and Karamu have decided to work together on a remake of the classic In Living Color sketch, Men on Film. Their project will be titled, Men on MMA. They also plan to start a family and hope to adopt a newborn baby boy who they will name Colby.

“… in Octagon formation!”